Coping with a Challenging Boss

We’ve all been there. A manager who complains about your work, ignores your request for support and guidance or just seems not to be aware of the challenges you face.

It certainly isn’t easy to cope with a difficult manager. When these uncomfortable run-ins frequently occur, it the situation generally gets challenging.  Here are some things to try before moving on:

Check Out the Situation

Sometimes, it can be difficult to admit our own failings or faults. Before you decide your manager is just being difficult, think back on your past interactions with him or her. Is your manager really being difficult or simply following up on all your job duties? Could it be that you have been falling behind or not meeting your goals and he or she is just making sure you don’t miss anymore targets?

Find Out Why 

If you determine that the problems between the two of you do stem from your boss, you need to find out why he or she is acting this way. Otherwise, it will probably very hard to shift your relationship with them.

Could there be additional pressures or expectations that your boss is dealing with which could be causing him or her to react this way? Put yourself in your boss’s shoes and imagine how you would feel if you were dealing with the same situation. It may give you some insight on why your boss is giving you a hard time.

Consult with Your Co-Workers

Your co-workers may be able to tell you a bit more about why your manager acts a certain way, especially if you are relatively new to the workplace. Ask them if they notice the behavior and if it’s typical of your boss or something that your manager has only been doing recently.

Not only can your co-workers give you some insight that may help you understand your boss’ motivations, they may also be willing to help you stand up to your manager if things get out of hand.

Crush You Work

If you aren’t getting along with your manager, it’s best not to give them a reason to doubt your performance. Don’t let their negative attitude put a damper on your work performance. Triple time your efforts and get as much work done as you can. By doing this, when they interact with you, there’s nothing to focus on except your exceptional performance.

In addition, make sure that you are always on time to work. Avoid taking longer than the time allotted for breaks or for lunch. Showing up late and taking extended lunches gives your manager an excuse to be critical.

Talk to HR or Your Boss’ Boss

If all else fails, discuss the situation with your HR department or, if your company doesn’t have one, your boss’ manager. Approach it from the standpoint that you want to improve your relationship with your manager so you can excel in your role. If you are genuine in your desire to improve your working relationship, these people will be able to tell and help mediate a positive outcome.

Think about Moving On

If after all of this you still can’t make the situation work with your boss, then you may want to consider moving on. We all know it can be challenging to reach your full potential at work when dealing with a difficult manager or boss. You won’t succeed at a job working for a difficult manager as much as you would working for a boss that you respect and that respects you in return. If you can’t get your manager to change his or her behavior, it may be best to move on to a different job or a different position within the company.

Don’t let a strained relationship with your manager force you to quit your job without trying all of the suggestions mentioned above, though.

Reality Check

Remember though, difficult people can be found no matter how high up the professional ladder you climb. There isn’t a job on this earth that doesn’t have its fair share of challenging individuals and situations to deal with. I’m not advocating staying at a job where you feel abused or bullied. I just want to impress upon you that running from difficult situations won’t keep them from ever coming back. Be honest about your role in the situation and if you have truly tried everything to fix it, then opt out. If you have done all you could then— no fear, guilt, or worry in letting go and moving on.

We only have one life. Make it the one you truly want. At work and at play.

Have you had the experience of dealing with a challenging boss or employee? How have you handled it?